When 2012 began I had a good feeling about it. I thought this would be my year. I thought I would see success and have better finances. It didn't take long for that to change and as it turned out 2012 had become the worst year of my life. I lost my best friend, my job, and sadly my dog.First, I saw most of my bills increase. I have always paid my bills on time however that has become a problem. We then saw the gas prices soar to new highs. This really hurt me because my commute to my day job was far from where I lived. I watched my bank account drain out like a large hole in the side of an above ground swimming pool!
In my 40 hours a week job, things began to go wrong there as well. When I started there more than eight years ago it was my intention to only be there a year. Unfortunately things don’t always go as planned. Within the workplace cuts and downsizing were being done. I was a solid worker but suddenly I became a target. At the beginning of May my bosses called me into a meeting where things went very wrong. They accused me of things that were not true. My job position was being threatened in one of the worst economies in US history and to make things even worse the source behind all of this turned out to be my best friend. I knew him for most of my life. We grew up together. He was there to see the struggles that my family went through first hand and what I had personally gone through. I was open and honest with him at all times unlike him. When he lost his job, while his mother was dying, I stepped up as a friend and got him a job with me. I trained him and yet he would stab me in the back. He confessed to me that he was telling the office staff bad things about me after I would leave for the day. He painted a picture to them that I was some angry violent nut job. I have no history of violence and yet he lied anyway. I don’t know why but I think he was so selfish that he wanted to protect his own ass. He knew they were making cuts so perhaps he felt he would help push me out so he would be safe. He had only been there for three years compared to my eight.
After the end of this nearly life long friendship and what I was going though in that hostile workplace I decided to change my life. I wanted to work for myself and leave that job. I spent the summer seeking opportunities. I created art, videos, professional photographs, writing, and so many more things. I got my name all over the internet and stepped out of my comfort zone. At times things were looking up but it wouldn't last. I just couldn't make enough money a week to support myself. Between my day job and working at home I was putting in 16 to 18 hours a day. Sometimes I wouldn't go to bed until 3:00 am only to wake up at 6:30 am and do it all over again. I was tired but I had a mission.
On September 14, a Friday, I got called into my supervisor’s office. He goes on to tell me that they feel I am not happy there and then the selfish bastard terminates my job after eight years of solid service. He had betrayed my trust. You can read more about this in my story “You always get paid on Friday.” I became sick to my stomach. My worst fear came true. I now faced losing everything I worked so hard to get. I spent the next month working all day trying to get income to come in. So far I have not been able to make enough to survive or even close to it. Exactly one month to day, after I lost my job, my second biggest fear happened. My family’s dog died. Although we all lived in different places, we all loved this dog and were very close. I had lived with her for six years and when I moved into my house I would visit her as much as possible. She even loved visiting my house and playing out in the backyard. She brought my family back together after we had lost so much including our relationship to each other. She brought joy and happiness to us all. To see her suddenly get sick and then to have her pass away on October 14 was heartbreaking.
While everything went wrong this year, it left me with one big question. Why? I came to believe that there had to be reason why I had gone though so many bad things this year. Really it’s more than just this year. There must be a reason why I had to struggle like I have. I felt that God had a purpose for me and I failed to realize it until now. I believe that I am going through all of this in order to help and inspire others. I have a dream and have been fighting to make it come true. I want to be successful and I have spent my life determined to make it all happen. I feel that while I chase my dream I am to bring others along with me. You will learn more about my dream in future posts.
I feel that this is the best time for me to make a difference to others. I am in the best position today to take you along on my journey in my pursuit of happiness. As I write this I am not rich, I’m unemployed, mourning a death of a beloved pet, and struggling like never before. With all of that I am still on the road to reach my destiny. While I travel along, I will bring you with me. I think that if I waited until I was successful and then told you about how I got there it wouldn't be as effective. I feel it will make more of a difference to actually be a witness to things as it unfolds in real time. I know there are many others out there like me who may want to give up or have done so already. Like me, you probably seek out inspiration from others. I invite you to take this journey with me. I will be open and honest and never sugarcoat anything. I look forward to telling you my story and having you there with me as the future unfolds.
